Don't Stop Believin (or why I love Glee)

Yes, I love Glee. Last Spring I sat in my room, nursing my babe to sleep, and I saw it. I saw a glimpse of my youth. But wait, that wasn't me on the stage singing "On My Own", no that was the cute girl from Glee my new favorite show.

When I was in 7th grade I had a music teacher who saw something in me. She saw someone who loved to sing and had a small (ahem) flair for the dramatic. She told me about this magical place in ElDorado, Kansas where Jr. High and High School show choirs would converge every summer. This magical place called the American Show and Jazz Choir Camp, ASJCC.

She talked to my folks, I saved money, they saved money and I was good to go. Mrs. Morris and I, armed with plenty of Michael Bolton and Kenny G tapes made the trek to Butler County Community College for a week of fun.

Really, fun doesn't even begin to describe it. I was the only one from my school who went, but that didn't matter. The other schools would just welcome me into their little tribes. We stayed in the dorms, I went to classes, developed new vocal skills, made friends, fell in love (you know that love that you fall into when you're 13 and 14), and learned something really important -- this is what I wanted to do for the rest of my life.

I loved performing. I loved singing. You put them both together?? It was a match made in Heaven.

I learned that I love to sing Jazz and many of those songs are perfect for my smoky alto voice. I learned that I shouldn't try to be something I'm not (a soprano) and that my voice was good the way it was. I learned that I really should pursue my talent of writing music. I learned that a boy with curly brown hair and electric blue eyes would stir feelings in me I never knew possible. I learned that I could go away for a week and stay true to who I was, and be accepted for that.

I learned so much about myself, but at the time all I worried about was the boys, the music, the dancing, the performances and being the best I could be.

Tonight, as we were watching Glee, Jeremy said, "I know why you love this show so much".
"Oh really? You do?? Enlighten me".
"Because that is what you wished High School was really like, what you wish your high school experience had been like".

That might be true a little bit, but really, I love it because it taps into that part of me that I had forgotten about. The part that could listen to a good song and picture leading a show choir in singing it. The part of me that used to listen to Barry Manilow and see in my mind how my show choir, the one that I would be the director of, would perform it. I watch it and I feel that immense joy and excitement of performing for others. I can feel the exhilaration that comes when you know you did an amazing job and everyone else in the room knows it too.

I love this show because it is what I always wanted to do. It is music, it is acting, it is life. And I love it.