It seems that it has been years since I have sat down to really write something here. I have so much to say, but just can't say it. The words aren't coming. They are stuck in my throat, in my mind, in my heart.
My life is in upheaval right now. My laundry room is being finished by my fabulous husband and brother-in-law, my kitchen is half painted and missing two cupboards, I have a gazillion tomatoes that need to be bottled and put up for the Winter, and and and...there is so much to do.
But, I am exhausted and sick and not feeling up to snuff. It's like my depression has found a good friend in my pregnancy sickness and they are having a party. Except it's a party that no one would want to come to, especially not me.
Jeremy has had 3 interviews this week and will have another next week. I just wish I knew where we were going to be, what we were going to be doing, where the next chapter of our lives is going to be.
Seth is acting up at home and school. I am sure it is related to our lives being in such chaos right now.
Amelia and Libby are whiny. I am cranky.
I am leaving tomorrow though. I am headed to North Carolina for Type A Mom Conference. I am speaking about Emotional Blogging. Kind of funny since I haven't really written anything in a while. I guess all those emotions just don't want to show their faces right now.
That's okay, I am sure that there will be a space for them this weekend as I sit with my good friends, listen, laugh and I am sure cry.
Hopefully soon I will be able to give these emotions room to breathe and a place to live, other in my tight chest. Until then....