Moving Week

I know I said I was done for 2 weeks...but I have all these thoughts swirling in my head and heart and had to put it down into words, because that is how I process things, through writing....

The packers come tomorrow. 

They load the moving truck on Tuesday.

We clean on Wednesday and Thursday.

We leave for our 3 hour day tour on Friday.

I can't believe it's already here.  My heart is torn.  I love it here, I really do.  I know where I fit, and what to do here.  I have lots of friends, I have babysitters, I know where everything is. 

I am scared to leave.  I am scared to start over somewhere new.  I am excited for this new adventure and friends that will greet me in our new home.

But, but, but...

This is the last night we will sleep in this house.

This house...

This house where my kids have grown.  The only house they remember. 

The house where Libby was born, learned to crawl, walk, & talk.

This house where Seth grew from toddler to boy.  Where he learned to read, write, ride a bike, and started school.

This house where Amelia went from baby to little girl.  This house where she learned to use the potty, pump herself on the swing and learned the fine art of story telling.

This house that I love so much.

But as I think about it, it is not so much the house I love, but the people and memories that it has held.

I guess when I think of it this way, it is okay because they will all be with me.

I will see you all when I am in sunny Texas.  Have a wonderful New Year.

Christmas Surprise

I am working on the biggest Christmas surprise of the year today.

The children and I are heading to Salt Lake to play with friends.  Then they think we are going to Temple Square to look at the lights.  Which is all true.  What they don't know is that this guy will be there waiting for us.

I think he's even better than the guy in the red suit, don't you?

I am going to be taking off the next two weeks and will post again from our new home in sunny Austin.

I am wishing each of you a very Merry Christmas and the happiest of New Years.

Much love and be safe.

xo

Don't get cocky.

6:45 pm - Amelia falls asleep.  Do a small victory dance and then remember the other two that I have to wrestle into bed.

7:30 pm - Seth is tired and cold, send him to bed.  He goes to sleep without a fight.  This is a miracle in and of it's self.

7:45 pm - Libby wants to go "seep wif Mia", so I send her in, sing her a few songs and she is out.

8:00 pm. - Feeling pretty good about myself, settle down with some knitting and pat myself on the back.

8:45pm 10:00 pm - Libby wakes up crying every 30 minutes.  Go in and comfort her, give her a drink of water and tuck her in.  Lather, rinse, repeat.

10:00 pm - get settled in bed and start to fall asleep.

10:05 pm - Libby wakes up (again) bring her into my bed so we can both get some sleep.

10:06 pm - hear the cat in the sink cleaning the dishes I didn't get done.  Get up and shoo him out so he doesn't end up puking all over my house.

10:08 pm - settle back in bed.

10:09 pm - Libby wakes up screaming (can she really wake up when she's only been in my bed for 4 minutes?) and demands to go back to her bed.

10:11 pm - give up trying to keep her in my bed and take her back to hers. Get her settled with a drink and blankets.

10:12 pm - hear running up the stairs that can only mean Seth is awake. great.

10:15 pm - go into my room ready to crash and remember Seth is in my bed.  Pick him up (dang he is big) and carry him back downstairs (and try not to trip over the cat on the stairs) to his bed. Give him a kiss and tell him good night.

10:17 pm - shoo the cat out of the sink again and curse myself for not taking care of those dishes earlier.

10:18 pm - collapse into bed, cover up and immediately hear Libby screaming again.

10:19 pm - assess the Libby situation, see she has a fever, give some ibuprofen and pray she will sleep now.

10:25 pm - had 6 glorious minutes of peace only to be awaken by the wails of my youngest again.

10:26 pm - 5:00 am - restless sleep with 2 feverish girls in my bed.  Be sure to stay on one side all night so that Libby doesn't move and is happy.  Think about how everyone will be feeling better in the morning and I can go to the chiropractor to get myself adjusted and feeling better.

5:00 am - Seth informs me he is awake and wants to play Wii right now. I tell him absolutely not and to go back to bed.

5:01 am - 7:00 am - resume my very restless sleep.

7:00 am - awaken by a text (or two) from my darling dearest love of my life.

8:00 am - get up and get Seth ready for school.

8:05 am - as he is getting ready to get dressed, Seth throws up.

8:06 am - realize today is going to be just as awesome as the last 4 days.  Yay.

8:07 am - inform my sweet boy he doesn't get to go to his class party, or say goodbye to any of his school friends, or see his school again before we move.

8:09 am - cry and curse Jeremy for not being home today instead of tomorrow.

Here is my lesson for all of you.  Don't get cocky when your kids go to bed easily.  It will bite you in the butt.

Good intentions

Goodies for the neighbors are made and ready to be delivered.
But they will sit on the counter until we move.

Gifts are bought and ready to be wrapped.
But the wrapping paper is not being touched.

Secret Christmas gifts are cut out and ready to be sewn.
But, the machine sits silent.

Mama and her babies are all sick.
So we lay around watching movies and trying to heal.

How was your weekend?

Birthday Girl

Today Emma turns 8.  In our religion, this is a pretty big deal.  You see, when a child turns 8, they can be baptized.  We don't baptize as babies because we don't believe that babies can sin.  They are perfect and can't really be held accountable for their mistakes until they are 8.  Plus, at that point, they can understand a bit better what they are getting into.

This year I have watched many of my friends who I was pregnant with, have their kiddos turn 8.  I have seen the pictures on their blogs of these special days.  I have seen the pretty white dresses, the pictures of the kids with their Moms and Dads, and read the posts about what they did on that day.

Emma in her 1st white dress, on her blessing day.

With each one, I ached for my little girl.  My little girl who was so perfect, she didn't need to be tested and tried by this life.  My little girl who was so perfect, she didn't need baptism.  My little girl, who 8 years ago today, was born.

I wonder what she would be like now.  How long would her hair be?  Would she be taking dance classes like her sister?  Would she be like me and just now be losing her teeth, or would she have done it earlier?  Would she be loving 2nd grade?  Who would her best friend be?  What music would she like?  What would she look like?  What would her voice sound like?  What would her laugh sound like?

These are questions I have everyday, but especially today, on her birthday.

But today, we will celebrate her birth.  We will buy her gifts and donate them to Toys for Tots, the kids will pick a lunch store and we will go to a local fun park to play arcade games and just have fun.  We will celebrate with family, eat cake and remember our sweet girl. This year, we are going to remember her with laughter (and I am sure a few tears), but we are going to celebrate her life, no matter how short.

Today is my sweet Emma's day.  I am so glad she was born.  I am overjoyed that I am her Mom.  She has brought me more joy than I ever dreamed possible.

 

Happy Birthday baby girl.  You made me a Mama and I will forever love you.

Make photo slide shows at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Like Father Like Daughter

This little girl is a bit like her Father.  She can not go to bed at night unless her bed is perfect. 

They are both a little OCD.  And oh how I love it.

Roller Coaster

I am currently 19 weeks pregnant.  With each of my children, I have felt kicks, back flips and sommersaults by this point.  This baby has been different.  Every time I thought I had felt something it turned out to be gas.  How do I know?  Because I would toot right after said "movement".  Yes, I just said toot.

Anyway, to say this 5th pregnancy has been different would be putting it lightly.

Yesterday I called my midwife because I was really worried that I hadn't felt the baby move yet.  That is right, 4 weeks after I'd felt the other babies move, I still hadn't felt this one.

She wisely suggested I drink some juice and lie down and have some quiet time to try to feel the baby.  Well, that would work if I weren't a single Mama right now.  There is NO quiet time around here.  I tried, but I felt nothing.

This morning she called and said she wanted to see what was going on and wanted me to come up to her office in Idaho for an ultrasound.  This office is an hour and a half away.  Yes an hour and a half.

I made arrangements for Seth for after school, packed up my girls and started driving.  I called my Mom, who in turn called my sisters.  Jeremy's sister called me and I told her what was going on.  I called Loralee, who just happens to be in NYC right now (we were both dying).  I was a sobbing mess for about 30 minutes of my drive and then felt peace.

I felt the prayers of my sweet husband, my parents, my sisters, my friends.  I felt their love and the love of God encircling me, and I was at peace.  I enjoyed the rest of my drive.

We arrived and my midwife pulled me into her office.  First things first, she found a heart beat.  Never was a sound more beautiful than that.

Shortly after that, the ultrasound tech was ready for me.  I was measuring 25 cm and am 19 weeks.  They were thinking twins, I was thinking another boy.  I measured 7 weeks ahead with Seth from 20 weeks on.  So that was my first thought.

Still feeling very at peace, I called Jeremy, put him on speaker phone and let the tech do her thing.  The first thing I saw was a little something between the legs.  But, since I'd never seen one of those in an ultrasound, I wasn't sure.

She measured, checked the heart and told me that the placenta was in front.  This is why I haven't felt any movement.  The baby is using it as a punching bag, but I can't feel a thing!  Little stinker ;)

Then came the moment of truth.  Boy or girl?  Of my 5 pregnancies, I have only wanted to know twice. I found out 3 times, but that is another story for another day.

I wanted to know with Amelia and wouldn't you know it, she was SO modest with her little legs crossed, it took a lot of coercing her to show us the goods.

This baby is much the same.  I had to move my belly and talk to the baby to open up the legs.

Then we saw it, the money shot...a PENIS!!!!!!!!!!!!  Amelia started screaming and yelling with excitement.  Jeremy and I were both pretty excited too.

I couldn't wait to rush home and tell my little boy he was FINALLY going to have a brother.  He has been praying for a brother for years now.  He even told me if this baby was a girl that he would never talk to her.

Amelia really wanted to tell Seth about the baby, so I let her.  Jeremy said he wished he could have been here when I told Seth.

Lucky for him, I have a Flip.  So babe, this is for you...and everyone else too ;)

Holiday Gift Guide Part 2

**And the winners are....Kate for the book and Jenlynthomas for the Kidzsack.  I will email both of you.  Thanks so much for everyone participating!!!

It wouldn't be the Christmas season without ornaments for the tree and Christmas books.  We have an entire bin of Christmas books that I get out on November 1st every year.  The kids love them, and so do I.

This summer when I was at Blogher, I was invited to a Christmas in August party hosted by Hallmark.  I was able to get a sneak peek at many of their amazing new Christmas ornaments, books, and ideas.  I had such a great time!  One thing that caught my eye was the new Recordable Storybooks.  There are 3 different books, Frosty The Snowman, The Very First Christmas and The Night Before Christmas. I loved this idea so much and wanted to get one for my folks to record for my kids.

A few months went by, Jeremy lost his job, I found out I was pregnant and we found out we'd be moving to Texas.  When my box from Hallmark came in the mail the first week of November, I was so excited to see the recordable Frosty the Snowman book.  I knew as soon as I saw it that it was going to become a very special book for my children.  You see, I knew Jeremy would be leaving the day after Thanksgiving, and that my little ones would really miss having their Daddy read to them every night.  So, Jeremy recorded the book for the kids.  It really is a treasure.  Just see for yourself...

There is something magical about putting up the Christmas tree every year and getting out your ornaments.  Hallmark also sent me these 3 ornaments for my children.

Amelia's

Libby's

Seth's Hiccup and Toothless

My kids love coloring, drawing and really anything that has to do with art.  So, when I found out about Kidzsack, I was really excited.  Here is a bag that they can decorate over and over and over!!!

There are several designs to choose from and it comes with washable markers.  Have your kiddos color it, use it and when they want to color it again, you wash it!  Easy as pie!  My kids LOVE theirs and use it to tote everything from books to babies!

One of my favorite things to get during the holidays are cards.  I love to see family pictures, see how everyone has changed, and read about how the families of my family and friends are doing.

I ordered our cards this year from Tiny Prints this year.  They have such a HUGE selection (I had about 6 or 7 different designs in my cart!).

 

I absolutely love this design.  On the back there is a spot where I could write a little message.  I loved that I didn't have to write a separate note and stuff each card with it.  With hundreds of designs, there is something perfect for everyone!

With this gift guide I have a couple of giveaways.  

First, a Frosty the Snowman recordable storybook from Hallmark.  This is such a great book and it is really easy to use.

Second, I have a Kidzsack Sports design bag to give to one of you!

 

I will choose 2 winners at random on Friday, December 10 at 9 pm MST.  Just leave me a comment telling me your favorite holiday tradition and let me know which of these items you want to win.

Good luck and Happy Holidays!!!

*A big thank you to all of those who have gifted me these amazing items, Hallmark, Tiny Prints and Kidzsack.  While I was given some great things to review, the words, sentiments and opinions are all mine.

Lonely

Two weeks ago one of our kitties died.  It was in the middle of a blizzard and Jeremy found her in the garage on the floor.  She wasn't cold, she wasn't hungry, she just died.

We got our kitties, Gracie and Sandy, Memorial day weekend 2008.  They are brother and sister.  While they didn't always get along, really they fought a lot, they were friends and loved each other.

In the days that have followed Gracie's death, I have found Sandy wandering aimlessly.  He goes out to the garage and lays in her spot by the door.  I see him sniffing around for her, feeling a bit lonely and lost without her.

Today I realized that I am feeling a bit like Sandy.  My partner in crime is gone and I just kind of wander around a bit and feel lost.  Even though Jeremy is only gone for 4 weeks, I am so used to him and I just miss him.

Only 16 days...

Before and After

 

Oh the difference 2 weeks makes.  Winter is officially here.  I can't wait to get to Texas where I won't have to shovel this gross white stuff anymore!

Villa La Paz

One of my very dear friends, Michelle, has been hosting different raffles to raise money for Villa La Paz Foundation.  This is a foundation that is very near and dear to her heart.  She even went to Peru this last summer to volunteer her time.

When I asked her a bit about the foundation, here is what she had to say,

For my entries from my two weeks there you can go to my blog and go to the late July and early August entries for my journaling and pictures.  Keep in mind that these children that are taken care of there by Tony are the most poor and ill/crippled children in the country, and without the care of Dr. Tony they would basically be left to die.  He is their ONLY hope!  He takes them into his home, cares for them, provides all of their medical care and needs, and then they go back home once they are completely rehabilitated.  And it is NO COST to the families (they would never be able to afford it).  

There are currently 54 children in the home (10 infants and 44 older than one), and many of them require around the clock care.

At her own expense, Michelle has given away some amazing items, just to bring attention to and raise money for Villa La Paz.

Beginning today, Thursday, December 2, 2010, each $5.00 donation that you make to Villa La Paz will give you one entry into a drawing for a brand new Apple iPad AND a black leather case for the iPad. All you have to do is go to Michelle's blog and follow the instructions.

The raffle/fundraiser will continue until Monday, December 20, 2010 so that the winner can receive it in time for Christmas. She would like to make this the biggest month so far in terms of the amount of donations, so please remember to spread the message to everyone you know about this opportunity to not only win the iPad and case, but to help some children who are in desperate need.

During this season of giving, let's all take a moment and give to those who need it most.

Thanks for this reminder Michelle.

You say...

They are wild.

They bounce off the walls.

They are crazy.

 They are loud.

 They are not reverent.

They are out of control.

You might feel inclined to tell me these things and wish me luck with "those kids".

But please remember "those kids" are my babies.

I love them more than life.

They have saved me on more than one occasion.

And while you may think you are being "helpful", you are really hurting me and breaking my heart.  

Your little passive aggressive digs at my parenting by putting down my children are not fair.  

Not fair to them.  

If you have a problem with how I parent, just tell me.  Don't bring these sweet little souls into it.

Because while they may not be the calm, quiet children who subscribe to the idea that children are to be seen not heard, they are mine and they are perfect for me.

14 Days

Today is December 1.  

In 14 days you would have been turning 8.

 

I love you baby girl.